New Poem: I Grew A Beard

Well this poem came out of nowhere! Basically I got a bit too lazy to shave then decided I would grow a beard for a bit until I could be bothered to shave properly again. After a week’s growth, my wife said that it really suited me. Then other people, after initially asking me when I was going to shave, started to say they like it. So there we go, I now have a beard. Only problem is that I have no beard trimmer so it is all starting to look a bit crazy. You can read the poem the beard inspired below, and even see my beard to decided whether it looks good or not. It is hopefully written like a journey, from unsure stubble, to proud beard owner onto unkempt fraud. If you want a few more clicks you can also read the poem in my poetry collection on wattpad entitled ‘Bad Poetry You probably never want to read.’ There is other poorly written poetry there too!


I Grew A Beard


I grew a beard

When the stubble appeared

I looked like a zero

More hobo than hero


I grew a beard

A path I almost veered

When people started asking

How long this fluff was lasting


I grew a beard

I thought you’d sneered

At my lovely bristles

A face full of thistles


I grew a beard

But it’s not what I feared

I thought it would itch

Until full-bodied and rich


I grew a beard

I thought it looked weird

But it looks quite good

Much better than it should


I grew a beard

I didn’t get jeered

Just got asked a question

About my hairy direction


I grew a beard

Glad I persevered

It doesn’t look too bad

My view’s now ironclad


I grew a beard

Now it’s quite revered

It’s talk of the town

A metaphorical crown


I grew a beard

And now I’m cheered

A sophisticated man

Part of an elegant clan


I grew a beard

It’s got dog-eared

I don’t have a trimmer

How can I get it thinner?


I grew a beard

With food it’s smeared

Why won’t it behave?

I think I’ll just need to shave


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